The slipperiest material know to mortal men??
Posted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 10:54 am
Well now folks..another longwinded tale about to unfold here so sit back..cool down yer favorite beverage.... and have a sense of humor. Arrived home from work today...6a.m.....I work night-shift. Went down to the garage and being tired (and somewhat lazy) I decided to just grab up the 8ft. fiberglas ladder and poke and prod about on the edge of the roof to seal some areas and tend to some caulking around newly installed windows. Yes...I should have used the 12ft. multi-function-folding-fits-any-terrain ladder. (Lowes/H.D.....$99..buy one!) None of that matters of course..one would be as hazardous as another in my situation..and so on to the story. I'm working in a small area...I call it my flower-bed. In reality it is better known as The Litter-Box for the Tri-State Area for feral cats. Yes..cats from Pa., Va., Md., and some say W.Va. come here to make their deposits. Judging from the size of the deposits...I think elephants from The Bronx Zoo may visit here as well! I've seen asteroids smaller than these "tid-bits"!!! Pluto has planets smaller than this orbiting it's outer belts! O.K....ya'll get the picture. Anyway....while setting up the ladder I managed to step in..not 1..but 2 of these...piles! Both feet..in worn leather boots. And, of course, I have to climb up to the top rung to reach the roof edge....to make my repairs. Folks...teflon is slippery. Grease, banana peels, mangoes, noodles and sundry other food items are slippery. Puddy much so. It took me 20 minutes to fall 8ft. to the ground off that ladder! On the way down I bounced off every rung...ripped siding off the side of my home...and shutters...and rain gutters...nails, screws, tore a window loose, removed the telephone&cable lines, tore out the rodedendroms and ripped most of the limbs from a 30ft. pine tree on my way!! I arrived on "terre-firma" on my back..mouth wide open in a littany of expletives and swallowed (I hope!) a huge chunk of dirt tossed skyward in my descent. No worries my friends...I'm still all in one piece!! Tommorrow....I'm gonn'a fire up the chainsaw and trim them pine trees! Till then..gitter done! Audie....(hack!)..the Oldfart...
